Well, I have seen it. I know we have all seen it. It is one of those icons that we all know what it looks like and have seen a hundred pictures of it, as well as seen it featured in movies and commercials. I assumed it was another of those sites that you visit just to "have been" there, but I can now say unequivocally that it deserves to be seen in person. I am referring to the Taj Mahal and it is a site to behold. We got up at 5:30 AM this morning to get there, and even in the drizzle of the early morning you could tell that this was going to be good. You can't really appreciate the scale of it until you make it inside the gate, but even in the outer courtyard you can see the minarettes and the main dome...unbelievable.

Okay, enough swooning. Neal finally learned my Massadah lesson of ten years ago the other day. After eating at a dhaba, the indian equivalent of a truckstop, the first night in Dehli, followed by our both (me in a seriously limited fashion) chowing down at a "slightly more than a stand" restaurant near the train station the second night, he was whacked with a heavy dose of Dehli Belly. He missed a trip to the Agra Fort in order to stay in the room and clock his time in 6 yard dash.

I know some people will be a bit surprised to hear me say it, but India has to be the highlight of our travels thus far. It is so far removed from anything I have ever seen, or smelled, before and the sites we have seen have been so utterly interesting that it trumps most of the other countries. As for my distaste for the spice tumeric, which is used in over 50% of Indian dishes, I am working around that problem. We are now in Jaipur, after a surprisingly easy drive through the back roads of Rahjistan, and it seems nice. Tomorrow it is up in the AM to spend the day seeing more sights, and then the day after it is back to Dehli before shooting down to Kerala. On a side note, this whole playing tourist with the car, hotels, guides, and such taken care of has really been nice. Surprisingly, the guides we have had have been really informative and only very slightly pushy on the whole hawkers thing. Speaking of hawkers, if anyone needs any shit...and this stuff seems to be real shit (a 36 year calendar..what the fuck does that have to do with the Agra Fort?) just let me know and I'll buy it all up.

I can't even begin to explain where I am or what is going on around me. The planet I have landed on is clearly not related to my former home on planet Earth, and the alien lifeforms are, although aggressive, quite friendly overall...

Well, I am finally in India, and it is every wierd, crazy, hectic, overcrowded thing I thought it would be. I am not sure I can do any justice to the anarchy that exists just outside the door of where I sit this very second, but I can try.
I suppose it all began back in Nepal, where our final minutes in country were frentic and loaded with comedy. We awoke with the crack of dawn, and not much sleep for myself (seems to be a side of the Larium), and headed to the airport for our plane. When we got there we had to file into multiple lines crowded with folks who seemed to NEED to get to wherever the line ended as quickly as possible...never mind if you were standing there, a precursor of things to come. After getting our bags x-rayed, our exit fee payed, and bags checked, we headed up to clear customs. Being a highly organized country they of course opened one entire lane for the three flights all departing around the same time...needless to say that by the time we reached the customs guy we were ready to get hearded onto the plane simply to sit down...not gonna happen, as you then needed to stand in another queue of roughly 20 minutes to go through security clearance. Now, let me say that I personally am all for airport security, but did the guy really need to cup my package twice??? That's right, they felt the need to frisk every single person and they didn't even buy me a bite to eat before. That being the worst of it, we headed down to the gate area and had a seat to wait for them to call our row. Guess what? They don't call rows in nepal, they simply have a guy who walks out 8 minutes before the plane is scheduled to leave and hollers at the top of his lungs, "Dehli, Dehli, Dehli!" This leads to the "yelling fire in a crowded movie theatre" reaction and everyone bolts for the door, including the brothers Bodenheimer. Once through the munchiechie size door we walked toward the plane...but then were diverted so that we could...get this, load our bags onto the cart and shuffle them over to the waiting 737...are you fucking kidding me? Do I get to make my own breakfast and land the plane as well? As one might imagine this put me in a comic mood and probably was the best thing that could prepare me for the streets of Dehli.
Actually, our arrival was pretty easy as we had a friend of a friend who is a travel agent and she has hooked us up quite well. We were met at the airport and toured the city today in, get this, an a/c equipped car...none too fucking shabby. We leave tomorrow on the 6AM train to Agra for a view of the fort and the great Taj Mahal...then on to the city of Jaipur.
Back to Dehli...it's dirty, crowded, smoggy, poor, and wonderful. I admit to having been anticpating the worst, but for all that it is, the city is pretty amazing, and the people are nice when they aren't trying to sell you something...that and I must be one good lucking fucking dude, because everyone seems to enjoy staring at me...that or I have a boogie hanging out.

I guess I don't really know what else to say about the place...those of you that have experienced it can relate while I will never be able to convey, even with my magical prose, the feeling of waking up on another planet and knowing nothing about what comes next...I think it's fun.

On a side note...and something I believe I witnessed in Bangkok (home of all wierdness):
Did you know there is a band called "The A-teens"...sweet fuck where is a serious B.A. Barrackus ass whuppin when it is needed, do we not long for the carazy hopped up antics of Mad Murdock...somone please help!!!

I dreamt in Larium last night.
That may not mean much to many, but to some it states a night of really wierd, dare I say Kafkaesque, dreams. Actually it wasn't so bad, and the dreams, although certainly vivid, weren't the tortuous nightmares I had heard about...let's just see tonight.
Today was a day of dealing, everything from Neal's pilfered Visa #, to shipping a bunch of bargain basement shopping back to the states (80-20 it gets there), getting things set for our arrival in Dehli tomorrow, buying some sort of really pricey pashmina things for the lovely Bodenheimer ladies, to selling our unused misquito netting at a huge loss.
Oh, did I mention that we lunched on bratwurst and real, actual, non-yak milk cheese? It's true, and what a beautiful thing it was...thank the Yeti for "The Delicatessen Center". On the way we had to stroll by the U.S. embassy, and I was tempted to float the wall and touch US soil again for a moment, but then the thought passed, because they ain't got no po-boys and that's what I am really needing.
As for Nepal, I have a feeling when all is said and done, I will come back here some day. The hassling has gotten to me a bit, but we have been on the road in SE Asia for 4 months, so perhaps that is involved as well, and the people are genuinely very cool when you get past the touts. As for the scenery, it was spectacular on the rare occasions that we saw the mountains, and a return in either April or October is calling my name.
As I said, tomorrow it is off to Dehli and the craziness that is India. With a population of over a billion people I suspect things will be even more hectic than ever, and I am a bit wary of the prospect. We used a connection to arrange everything for Dehli, taking a bit of the excitement and spontenaity out of it (okay, all the spontenaity), but this will help the adjustment period, as there will be plenty of time for putzing around once we get down south. As for me, I am heading south now, for a nice tall drink and perhaps my last decent carniverorious (my new word of the day) meal...hasta lambada.

This newest blog brought to you by the fine makers of Caravan Premium Nepali Whisky and their motto, "A Friend in Hard Times"...don't you just love truth in advertising!

Anyway, our Nepalese portion of the trip is coming to a close, and I have enjoyed the time here, although my calves feel like a yak had it's cheese making festival on them...wait, that made absolutely no sense. Apologies, just finished a hectic 7 hour bus ride from Pohkara to the frenzy of Khatmandu and am feeling a bit week kneed. The trekking was strenuous to say the least, and with the adjustment to being at between 2 and 3 thousand meters (that's fucking high) it became a trudge at times...felt every last fried shrimp I've ever eaten. Unfortunately, going in the offseason means two things; you need to get up at 5 AM to see the peaks (which are really really fucking shaama lama lama ding dong sweet), and there are a large number of blood sucking freaks known as leaches all over...other than that things were peachy. Actually, it was a bit depressing for me on one count. I am not in any sort of decent shape, and am no longer built for any sort of outdoors activity that doesn't require some sort of machine with an internal combustion engine in it...I am SOFT. I know you all knew it, but I have now come face to face with the fact, so bring on leather club chair and the remote control!

Oh, did I mention that I found the lord while reflecting on life in the himilayas...yeah, his name is Senor Yeti and I'll be starting a temple in his honor when I return to the states...all hail the Tuk Tuk Temple of the Yeti!

Okay, obviously my thoughts are scattered, so I should shove off before I post something so inane or insane that you good god fearin folk never log onto the site again...that said, I'll sit down tomorrow and post something with a bit of biting wit, stinging sarcasm, and illicit insight into the seamy underworld of Nepal...if there is one.

Post from 6/21 that i couldn't get posted until today....

Time to confess my exhaustion. I suppose this will mostly fall on deaf ears, or ears that reply "Fuck you
and your bitching as you travel around the world", but it isn't all peaches and herb baby. There are bound to
be ups and downs as you go through such a long journey, but I feel as though I am at the end of some
arbitrary rope that keeps me from running through the streets of Pokhara (or any other Asian city) screaming
at the top of my lungs, although that would probably take effort that I don't neccesarily feel like
expending. Okay, it's not really that bad, just tiring.
We are now in the town/city of Pohkara where we are suiting up for 12+ days trekking in the Himilayas. We
finished a few days of whitewater rafting in a less than crystal clear river, but it was still fun. The
rain and clouds didn't ruin it in any way (other than soaking my bag) bacuase you're already fucking soaked
when rafting. I would say they even added a pretty cool feel to the whole adventure. We even got our
requisite "ride on the top of a truck through winding mountain roads" in. Sleeping in a tent in the backyard
of some Nepalese family and eating the fine campfire cusine (no sarcasm here, it really was good) reminds
me of some bizzaro camp horseshoe world, just without Frank Demyan reading out the days activities.
Neal has come down with a bug, now thatI got over mine, so we maydelay our entry into the high altitude
playground a day or so, as hiking up to 4200 meters with a cold might be less than fun. Other than that
things remain good, if tiring. I suspect that once we finish here, and hit the nightmare (in a good way of
course) that is Dehli, India we will need some serious R&R...odd how that works, we travel around the world
and need to slow down a relax a bit...

Anyway, the going has gotten wierd, so we as the wierd have followed the advice of the good Dr. Thompson and
gone pro!